Book reviews, Personal

On Empty Nesting: Time for My Interests

A year ago, I was really struggling with the idea of my girls growing up and having lives of their own, separate from me.  I’ve talked to several of my friends about it and they felt the same way.  For so long, so much of my time and energy – both physical and emotional – was invested in my kids and it was sad to know that was coming to an end as my girls are now 16 and 18.  They will both be taking college classes starting next month!

In the last year, however, I have realized that now is actually my time.  My time to pursue things that I am interested in – it’s not about what the kids want or giving them a particular experience – it’s about what I want.  I love to read and I love being part of the bookstagram and book review community–I get so many great recommendations and I love talking about the books I love with people who also love them!

I have also realized that now is the time for my husband and I.  It’s our time to do things together that we want to do.  We’ve always sort of done that, but now we can do it on a larger scale and more often because we don’t need babysitters!  It’s kind of like dating all over again!  We went away from Wednesday, July 4 through Friday, July 6, just the two of us.  We rented a tiny house in the Catskill Mountains.  We had no wi-fi and decided to make it an internet free time (we did check texts and text our kids).  We cooked at the tiny house, went on long walks and hikes, read books, sat by a fire and my husband played guitar.  It was wonderful and romantic.  We have another getaway scheduled for Labor Day weekend.

IMG-2297My husband and I also took on a challenge this year to go on 9 hikes.  We have had so much fun with this!  We have discovered some local trails that we never knew existed.  My husband has been talking to people and scouring the internet for new hikes to go on.  We walk and talk and sometimes just walk in silence.  My blood pressure just literally drops when I get into the woods.  I physically feel different, better, more calm and at peace.  Last weekend, we went out for an amazing vegan brunch at Seed to Sprout in Avon-by-the-Sea, NJ and then went to Cheesequake State Park.  My husband planned the whole thing and it was a beautiful, perfect day!!  The weather was perfect, the trails were quiet, the smell of sassafras was strong, we sat in a grove of cypress trees for a half hour, just taking it all in.

We are realizing that we can pursue our interests now – garden tours, vegan brunches, hiking.  As much as I miss when my girls were little and we did everything as a family, I am enjoying this time that I get to pursue things that I am interested in.

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4 thoughts on “On Empty Nesting: Time for My Interests”

  1. I have been going through this s well. I have taken up Zumba – and get to read as much as I used to. I have recently told my husband that we should go to the cinema again like we used to before the children were born 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. We are on vacation right now with our girls, but I keep wondering how many more family vacations we will have before they don’t want to travel with us anymore. I keep trying to look at the positives: then my husband and I can go to all the places we want to go that don’t seem right for a family vacation. I am getting to a point where I am really looking forward to the next phase. Going to the cinema again sounds like fun!! I haven’t been since we were taking the girls to see Disney movies!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We just went on a family vacation too with all three of our children – and we are unsure if it will happen again as our son has moved away.
        Guess it will take a while for us to get used to the change – and then we will love it 😊

        Like

  2. What a beautiful transition, and hiking in nature together, that’s so great. I love hiking and joined a group last year, gifting a day to myself to discover the area I live in and because the planning and research of the routes is a bit overwhelming I’m happy to be in a group where there is done by others and I can participate. I love that being in nature lowered your blood pressure, nature is indeed the greatest healer and sometimes just being immersed in it, can do wonders. Bonne Continuation!

    Liked by 1 person

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